The other day, I felt shitty. Incredibly shitty. The worst shitty I have ever experienced.

I think it was the culmination of Step 2 CS, too little sleep, too much caffeine and popping Dramamine/Claritin-D/aspirin like candy. I knew it was unhealthy, but I tell you, I had no choice! I get motion sick and had to travel like crazy. My allergies don’t let me breathe like me a normal person and I had to make good impressions on my interviews/get enough O2 during CS. And since I was feeling crappy, I needed to take some pain killers so I could enjoy quality friend time.

So yesterday, it all culminated to feeling the worst I’ve ever felt in my life (excluding illness/rib resections/etc). Usually sleep cures all my ails, but this time, my ails wouldn’t even let me get the rest I needed.

I’m feeling better now, though. Eventually, fatigue prevailed and I got the rest that I needed. But I had to take Dramamine again. Oh and Claritin-D. But don’t worry, I’ll be fine. I ran out of aspirin. (I didn’t.)

Just finished Inception.

I don’t know why it took me so long to watch this film. Everyone’s been raving about it and the reviews have been overwhelmingly positive.

It was long but I never wanted it to end. And I guess in a way, it never will. I started to dread the ending halfway through the film. I couldn’t forsee another ending then discovering the whole film had been a dream. It was inevitable, predictable and would do the film a disservice. So, even though the real ending still had loose ends, I couldn’t have been more satisfied. Was it still a dream, or now reality? Does it even matter?

Deep down, though, I think if I keep watching Inception over and over again, I’ll eventually find the answer. Like Memento, which could have a million different interpretations, but if you pick up on the clues, Memento actually answers who Leonard Shelby becomes and why he does what he does. I can only hope that Christopher Nolan has left me enough clues to discover if Mr. Cobb is truly lost or not.

Finished The Darkest Edge of Dawn, Book 2 of the Charlie Madigan Series by Kelly Gay, a couple days ago.

I really enjoyed Book 1 of the series, The Better Part of Darkness. The world building was complex and fleshed out. And the cast was intriguing. But, it took me a while to warm up to Charlie Madigan, the protagonist. She was extremely stubborn and in denial throughout most of the book. I still pulled for her, though, mostly because Kelly Gay described how much Charlie loved her daughter so well. I couldn't help but empathize with Charlie when all her emotions were so heart felt, well reasoned and well described.

This sequel seemed like a completely different book. After finishing, I felt like I had watched a blockbuster action film. A lot happens. There are relationship changes, fire fights, deaths, world saving/world dooming, etc. There's still a pretty cast in an extensive and detailed world. But, Charlie just stopped developing. Her massive stubbornness and unchanging denial was incredibly frustrating. In fact, the entire cast seemed to be superficially described with superficial reactions. I just stopped caring about her and everyone else after awhile.

**SPOILERS**

For example, if my extremely attractive/available/siren partner just voice fucked me against my will, I'd be more than just a little embarrassed and feeling awkward. I'd be angry, scared, conflicted, and maybe even a little ashamed. But no, Charlie promises herself she won't become one of those (aka Siren groupies), decides to forget about it for awhile and goes on to save the world instead.

**END SPOILERS**

Honestly, I'm not really looking forward to Book 3. I don't want to see how Charlie's relationships are forced to adapt to her inability to change. In the end, I want to see a protagonist that is challenged by the people around her and made better for it.

I think Karen Marie Moning has ruined me for PNR forever. Shadowfever was just that good.

OH MY GOD.

To the person who is still smoking on my floor.

I thought we already went over this. You had a stroke. Smoking is bad. PLEASE STOP.

want.

ipad + bluetooth keyboard + magic mouse

or someone to create the ultimate mobile work/play device by putting all three together.

Life = Gray.

The world is not divided into right vs wrong, black vs white, good vs evil. As much as we want the people who have wronged us in life to be plain evil, that's very rarely the truth. It takes a bigger person to admit that there is something good in the other, that perhaps even, there are similarities between me and "the other we shall never speak of."

When you start to see things as purely either/or, consider yourself with a Borderline Personality Disorder - a person who "splits" and views people as either with them or against them.

want.

0600. just finished Shadowfever. read it in one sitting, in one night. it was amazing.

OH MY GOD. Shadowfever, the last book to the mind blowingly incredible Fever Series, is out in less than 36 hours!!! I have been dying for the last 3 months. I CANNOT WAIT.

Barrons better not be dead.

http://www.karenmoning.com/kmm/novels/fever-series.html

recall bias: how to succeed during 1st and 2nd year

The first and second year of medical school is basically BRUTE MEMORIZATION and some thinking. I found the most effective/simplest way to succeed was by just going through the materials 4 times before the exams.

ie

#1) Read lecture notes/syllabus before lecture

#2) Go to lecture, take notes

#3) Read other source material after lecture (ie Harrison's, First Aid)

#4) Review notes before exam

If you make ppt flashcards (really useful for histo), it's more time-effective to split the work between a group of friends.

The above is simple and easy to apply to Anatomy, Histo, etc but still hard to do with only 24 hours in a day. But we all knew that.

recall bias: how to succeed at the shelfs

#1) Go through at least 2 texts on the clerkship. I like to do one review book and one qbank book.

#2) Learn EVERYTHING about your patients. Every shelf, I always see at least a couple questions on things I only learned from patients, not books.

recall bias: how to succeed at the osce's

#1) Study for the shelf

#2) Obtain passed on notes from previous year students (every school has them)

#3) Review all the common pathologies/orders for the clerkship using at least First Aid Step 2 CS rapid review section

#4) Review common pathology imagings: EKG/Xrays/CT's/Tissue pathology/etc

#5) optional: Practice with friends

The day of..

#1) Absolute Basics: (Taken from Step 2 CS First Aid)

• Knock on door before entering
• Introduce self by name
• Identify your role/position
• Correctly use patient's name
• Make eye contact with the SP

• Wash hands before exam
• Ask permission to start exam
• Use respectful draping
• No painful maneuvers

#2) Smile, be nice and be compassionate.

#3) Don't forget to ask those touchy-feely questions/bonding questions: I can see this bothers you, can you tell me more about it? What are your concerns right now? Oh you're an interior designer, I love interior design! etc etc (surprisingly, VERY IMP!)

recall bias: how to succeed at getting residency interviews

#1) Apply to as many programs as you want (finances are the limit)

#2) Accept all residency interviews in the beginning

#3) Take off the first month of the residency interview season. ie Internal Medicine interview season is late November, December, January. So take off at least December from School.

#4) Schedule 2-3 safety interviews first

#5) Schedule your top schools next (trust me, you only need to go through a couple interviews to be a pro). Also 2-3 schools will give you a better idea of what you really want from a residency program.

#6) Schedule the rest of your interviews

#7) Halfway through the season, contact all the programs who haven't responded yet - 1st email, 2nd call

#8) Now if you get interviews at places your app was still pending, you have room to still schedule/cancel your less competitive interviews and also to do some Second Looks.

damn hindsight.